Tuesday, October 31, 2006

A bargain at twice the price... 

Whatever Karl Rove's paying John Kerry, it isn't enough.

I mean, he's got to be on some secret right-wing payroll, right? He can't really be this dense, can he?

Holy Infested Attic! 

The town of Americus, Georgia, is plagued by bats?

The solution?

A crazy person from Alabama.

Sunday, October 29, 2006


The spouse is ready to give in to this "Best Show on TV" hype about Battlestar Galactica, and put it on the Netflix list. My question is, should we start with the miniseries or just go straight to Season 1?

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Amusing conversation with a telemarketer... 

Telemarketer: Hi, I'm calling from the Nation magazine. We're calling our subscribers, and thank you for subscribing by the way, but we're calling to ask you to become a Nation Associate, which is a group of people who make a donation above the cost of subscription which would allow us to...

Me: Ummm...look, before this goes any further, I think I should tell you I'm a Republican.

Telemarketer: ...Oh.

Me: Thanks for calling, though.

Telemarketer: You have a nice night.

I'll give them this. It's the easiest I've ever got rid of a telemarketer without flat out hanging up on them.

Just don't tell them I'm voting for Thurbert Baker.

Tennessee beats Georgia again... 

As if a spectacular second-half collapse on the field wasn't enough, Tennessee has now surpassed Georgia in another important area - the vicious dog mascot area.

Tennessee's mascot, Smokey IX, stands accused of biting Alabama receiver Mike McCoy during pre-game warm-ups at last week's game. (Which Tennessee won, if anyone cares.)

Smokey's handler denies that Smokey bit the player, but it wasn't for lack of trying. Alabama's coach claims the dog drew blood. (McCoy himself has been kept from the press.)

Judge for yourself - does this look like the face of a vicious attack dog?

If he actually bit McCoy - this puts the Vols ahead of the Bulldogs again. One of the proudest moments in Georgia history occurred in 1996 when the late UGA V lunged after Auburn wide receiver Robert Baker when Baker dared venture into the Georgia end zone.

UGA V's epitaph was "Defender of his turf." I've been to a couple of Georgia games, and they will occasionally play highlights of great UGA moments past. And I will tell you, Herschel Walker clinching a national championship doesn't get as big an ovation as UGA V's lunge.

But as valiant as UGA V was, he missed. Baker got away unscathed. (Although it should be noted that Georgia did win the game.)

Apparently Smokey got his man.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

That's what they want you to think... 

Some idiot claims to have proven that it is mathematically impossible for vampires to exist. This person is clearly a fool who is endangering all of humanity, perhaps deliberately. Permit me to explain...

First - his theory is based on the idea that a person becomes a vampire merely by being bitten by another vampire. This is not necessarily the case - common vampire mythology requires that vampire and his victim to drink each other's blood to cause the living to become the undead. See various episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel for further documentation. Also probably a lot of books. I didn't do much research on this.

Second - The professor doing this study is named Costas Efthimiou. He appears to be from Greece, which has a healthy vampire tradition of its own. Deliberate misinformation to soften up humanity for a vampire takeover? It would be irresponsible to rule it out.

Third - even if Dr. Efthimiou isn't working on behalf of his undead overlords, he's a professor at the University of Central Florida. Whose most famous alumnus is Daunte Culpepper. Who plays for a team that's 1-6. Perhaps Central Florida isn't the place to go for information that could doom humanity, is all I'm saying.

Who you gonna believe? This guy's got advanced degrees in physics and math is probably much smarter than me, but I've seen all three Blade movies, plus a couple episodes of the TV series. Hell, I even saw the Queen of the Damned movie. (Which you probably shouldn't. It's not, strictly speaking, good.)

Also - according to the Vampire Name Generator:

The Great Archives determine you to have gone by the identity:
Ariel Arnauld
Known in some parts of the world as:
Zeus of The Ghast
The Great Archives Record:
Of ghastly appearance, gaunt and white and gothic.

I rest my case.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Let's ask these guys who we should vote for... 

So, Warner Brothers was shooting the DiCaprio flick The Blood Diamond in South Africa. (I've seen the trailer. It doesn't look half bad.) To add realism, they brought in a number of children and teenagers who had lost limbs in tribal warfare to use as extras. In addition to their extra pay, the studio also promised to hook the kids up with prosthetic limbs, and give them a chance to build normal lives for themselves. Touching story, right?

Well, not yet. But it will be, we swear. See, the movie finished filming months ago, and the kids starting asking about the prosthetic limbs, and according to them, the movie studio explained to them that The Blood Diamond wasn't going to hit U.S. theaters until December 15, and their new limbs would have to wait until the studio could use them to bump up the opening. Because if they did it now, come December 15, you'd just go see Eragon.

Which, admittedly, has a dragon in it. Dragons are cool.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Shocked. No, really. 

PetitDove has yet another example of the totally neutral and not at all biased U.N.'s efforts to bring an evenhanded peace to the border of Israel and Lebanon.

Politics aside... 

Canadian Foreign Minister Peter MacKay in hot water over allegedly calling ex-girlfriend/current opposition MP Belinda Stronach a "dog."
Liberals said he made the dog reference during heckling over new environmental legislation when Liberal Member of Parliament David McGuinty, criticizing the bill, asked MacKay: "Don't you care about your dog?"

MacKay's response was to point at the empty chair where Stronach sits, saying "You already have her."
It should be noted that MacKay denies saying anything of the sort, and a transcript of the proceedings appears to back him up.

That said, regardless of which dog you have in this fight (no pun inten...oh, why lie about that?), can't we all agree if that anybody in politics has the right to say something mean-spirited towards another politician, it's Peter MacKay concerning Belinda Stronach?

Canadian politics - fun enough to forgive them for Celine Dion.

You're supposed to! 

The title of the post is the punchline to a Chris Rock joke where he is aghast when someone would tell him how proud they were of themselves for doing things that were clearly required by either the law, simple decency, or both.

"(Expletive Deleted), YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO!" Rock responded.

Keep that in mind when you read this story about the Boy Scouts giving out an activity patch in "Respecting Copyrights." That's right, the Boy Scouts will now give you an award for not stealing.

OK, that's not fair, you also have to show that you understand that stealing is bad.

We're doomed.

Tip - Volokh.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Fluent in neither Javascript nor Klingon... 

You are 44% white and nerdy.

Tip - the surprisingly less white and nerdy Dawn Summers.

It should be noted, in the interest of accuracy, that when I answered "yes" to the question of whether or not Stephen Hawking was in my library, I was referring to this:

I actually have at least two, I think.

Hit the music.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Tonya Harding, V. 2.0 

Backup punter at Northern Colorado University charged with attempted murder for allegedly stabbing the guy ahead of him on the depth chart.

Had he been successful in taking out starting punter Rafael Mendoza, accused hitman Mitch Cozad would have been the starting punter for a 1-6 team.

I'm as big a sports fan as any guy around, but that doesn't seem like a prize worth risking the rest of your life for.

Of course, if it was Cozad who tried to take out the guy keeping him off the field, he did a crappy job. Despite getting stabbed in his kicking leg, Mendoza only missed one game, and punted 10 times in UNC's last game, averaging 47.8 yards, including a 75-yard punt.

Oh, well, Tonya Harding did a crappy job of trying to take out Nancy Kerrigan, too.

Which goes to show - criminals are morons.

Please tell me I'm not the only one... 

...who reads the story about the guy who poked a whole in a Picasso after coming to an agreement to sell it for $139 million...

...and laughs.

They'll fix the painting, and he's still rich - so it can be funny, right?

And the other half just haven't been paying attention... 

Poll: Half of Americans believe Congress is corrupt.

Funny beginning, sad ending... 

There was an interesting story awhile back about people who chose to stay in New Orleans after Katrina. Zachary Bowen and Adrienne Hall were making the best of a bad situation, bartering with others for the necessities, and an amusing aside about Hall flashing passing police vehicles, helping ensure regular patrols of their area.

It was a nice story, full of optimism and resourcefulness. Unfortunately, the Hollywood ending was not to be - Bowen committed suicide this week, and his suicide note said he had killed his girlfriend. Police searched his apartment and found the burned and dismembered body of a woman feared to be Hall.

"Borat" Sequel writes itself... 

Kazakhstani government misspells the word "Bank" on their currency.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

I have plans April 6, 2007. 

You may do whatever you want on that day. As for me, I will be seeing the Tarantino/Rodriguez movie Grindhouse.

You may want me to do something else. You will tell me about your plan for that day, and I will ask you, "If I do what you want, will I get to see a chick with a machine gun for a leg?"

You will say "No."

And I will see Grindhouse.

Your own private dugout 

Company to sell coffins with logos of Major League Baseball Teams. The first teams available will be the Yankees, Red Sox, Tigers, Phillies, Dodgers, and, of course, the Cubs.

And if you want to be cremated, they'll have urns.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Not that I'm in a position to criticize... 

...but is Weevil looking a little chunky this season?

Best performance of K-Fed's life... 

Dear Rey Misterio:

I regret to inform you that you are no longer my favorite wrestler. This has nothing to do with your upcoming knee surgery, it's just that my favorite wrestler is now John Cena.

Why is John Cena my favorite wrestler?

This is why.

Tip - John DeWolfe.

Wesley Snipes, Willie Nelson. Willie Nelson, Wesley Snipes. 

Wesley Snipes accused of cheating the government out of $12 million in taxes.

Cast your vote now - should he pay this off with another "Blade" sequel, or an action comedy with Woody Harrelson?

And this would differ from before how? 

Mike Tyson wants to fight women.

And...not that the GOP needs any more piling on, but what retard thought this was a good idea?
At the press conference, Tyson posed for photos with fans, signed autographs and campaigned for Maryland U.S. Senate candidate Michael Steele.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Man, they'll let anybody set up a blog... 

Now in the blogosphere is none other than Eric Bischoff, who holds the record for doing both the most good and the most damage to pro wrestling by anyone not named "McMahon."

Bischoff is the guy Ted Turner hired to turn WCW into a legitimate competitor to the WWE, and amazingly enough, he not only competed, he surpassed Vince McMahon's efforts for almost two years. He lured away Kevin Nash and Scott Hall back when they were the WWE's top two stars, and he successfully engineered a heel turn for Hulk Hogan that still ranks high on the list of great wrestling moments. Under his watch, WCW also became a place for less conventional wrestlers (read: non-roid monsters) such as Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero to find an audience and deliver great wrestling, in addition to the showmanship of Hogan and Nash. He went south to Mexico and brought in some of the greats of Lucha Libre, who exposed U.S. fans to an entirely new style of wrestling. His creation of WCW Monday Nitro had something for everyone - great wrestling and amazing drama. For a time, Eric Bischoff owned pro wrestling in the U.S.

And then he crapped it all away. Vince and company didn't stay down for long, and when he started fighting back by improving his product and developing his own stars, Bischoff panicked - he overpaid for idiot celebrities who added nothing to the shows, he was unable or unwilling to keep Hulk Hogan & Co. from dragging the product down in a desperate quest to retain their grasp on the main event, he gave away matches that would have drawn millions on PPV, and generally started running his company in a way that could only suggest utter contempt for his audience.

Four words. World. Champion. David. Arquette.

I'm not kidding. (Side note to TNA - maybe part of the problem you have selling a promotion with Jeff Jarrett on top is people remember that Jarrett was the guy Arquette took his title from, and they live in fear it might happen again. Just saying.)

Anyway, he's got a book now, and I'm actually looking forward to reading it, just to hear how WCW's success was all him, and their catastrophic flameout was all due to Turner, Hogan, or Nash.

Who are these guys, and what have they done with the UN? 

First, I read that China may actually be doing its part to enforce UN sanctions on North Korea.

That was crazy enough. Then, Venezuela's bid to get on the Security Council, which Hugo Chavez assured the world was going to happen, so's he could lead the fight against Captain Unilateral?

Yeah, that's apparently not going to happen.

Damn - Stone Cold keeps this up, we may actually have to start taking the U.N. seriously. And since that would just unnecessarily complicate my world view, let's all support Christopher Dodd's campaign to keep the U.N. as a bad joke.

Justice is blind...also delicious 

A metro Atlanta judge ordered a defendant facing domestic violence charges for an incident on Christmas Day must, in addition to fines and counseling, pay for a Christmas dinner for the victims to make up for ruining Christmas last year.

God bless us every one.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Amazing, this stuff still makes me smile... 

George Ryan's request to remain free on bail pending his appeal has been denied. He will have to begin serving his sentence in January.

Just in time, too. Because in Illinois, the new corruption story doesn't wait for the old one. Current Governor Rod Blagojevich (pronounced "idiot") is now having troubles, with one of his closest advisers and fundraisers now under federal indictment for using his position to extort contributions. Two fun things about this - one, if you call Blagojevich an idiot, he has to agree with you, since his defense is he had no idea what his friend was doing. (A defense that worked oh-so-well when Ryan used it.) The second funny thing - the indicted fundraiser, Tony Rezko, missed his first court appearance, and is currently considered a fugitive. His lawyer swears he isn't ducking anything, and will be back shortly. Amazingly, the judge didn't take his word for it.

Illinois politics - where people want to be stupid, because that's the only way to avoid being corrupt.

I'll admit I'm not a huge college football fan... 

...but seriously, guys, Vanderbilt? At home?


Friday, October 13, 2006

Of course he did... 

OK, so the official Georgia State Lunatic, the Runaway Bride, sued her ex-fiance for keeping the profits from her trip to Crazytown. Can anyone guess what he did next?

If you said, "Why, he sued her right back," congratulations, you understand how things work in America.

Nobel Peace Prize... 

Again, any year George Ryan doesn't win is a year the Nobel committee could have done worse, but this year, their choice is someone who deserves both the attention and the accolades:
Bangladeshi economist Muhammad Yunus and his Grameen Bank won the Nobel Peace Prize on Friday for their pioneering use of tiny, seemingly insignificant loans — microcredit — to lift millions out of poverty.

"Yunus and Grameen Bank have shown that even the poorest of the poor can work to bring about their own development," the Nobel citation said.

Today the bank claims to have 6.6 million borrowers, 97 percent of whom are women, and provides services in more than 70,000 villages in Bangladesh. Its model of micro-financing has inspired similar efforts around the world.
And while one might think that making small loans that enable poor women to build a better life for them and their families would be an incredibly non-controversial thing to do, Yunus and his amazing concept have enemies. Islamic fundamentalists are outraged at Grameen's empowering of women, and have reacted violently. It hasn't stopped Yunus and his customers, however - there are millions of borrowers, and despite the fact that loans are made to the poorest of the poor, Grameen has a very low default rate, and turns a profit.

It's fashionable on the right to bash the Nobel committee - they gave a prize to Jimmy Carter primarily to stick a thumb in George Bush's eye, more than to reward Carter for his own efforts, they gave an award to Yassir Arafat, a track record that led to a dismissive belief that Cindy Sheehan would win this year.

Didn't happen. The Nobel Prize committee has acknowledged the work of a man who has borne threats, condemnations, and violence from Islamic extremists to devote his life to a concept that has brought prosperity, empowerment and dignity to places many believed it could never take root. Mohammed Yunus has made the world a better place. The Nobel Committee's announcement of the award is here. They have chosen a man and an institution who is a worthy recipient, and the choice is a credit to the Nobel Peace Prize.

Hey, it's a stressful job... 

Prosecutor arrested for walking around government office naked.

I would note that Orin Kerr doesn't think this behavior is technically a crime.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

A bigger bomb problem than that Poseidon movie... 

Memo to the North Koreans - if you're actually advanced enough to have a nuclear bomb...

Your soldiers really shouldn't need to be throwing rocks.

My thoughts on the matter are actually pretty well stated here in this post by Joe Katzman at Winds of Change. To sum up - the only entity with any chance of influencing Kim Jong-Il is China, and China is currently opting for their usual "sound and fury signifying nothing" response.
(Chinese Foreign Ministry spokesman) Liu urged diplomatic efforts to resolve the crisis and said that the time was not right for punishment, much less military action.
Katzman's suggestion is a discrete, off the record statement to the Chinese that should they not get this lunatic to dial down the nuke stuff, well...in that case, Japan or South Korea or God forbid, even Taiwan might feel the need to get nukes of their own, and if they felt that way, well, we wouldn't approve, but we'd understand, by which I mean full speed ahead. (I think most conventional estimates say that if Japan wanted to be a nuclear power, they could make it happen in about an hour.)

Of course, sanctions and a diplomatic throttling of Kim's regime is only one way to go. The other is to simply give them what they've been asking for, and what this whole nuclear thing was, most likely, designed to accomplish:
Of course, the part I've never really understood is our reluctance to give them the one thing they've consistently asked for over many decades: diplomatic recognition and some kind of security guarantee. After all, what's the downside? Treaty or not, if North Korea provoked a war we'd declare them in default of their obligations and then squash them. Recognition and security guarantees literally cost us nothing.
Us? No, assuring Kim Jong-Il that he's going to get to keep running his country the way he and his nutbag father ran it, and that he can pass North Korea on to his nutbag kids - that costs us nothing.

The 23 million North Koreas live in hell on earth. Any promise of security and recognition for Kim Jong-Il will only perpetuate that hell. Any aid we deliver will be used to prop up the regime and is frequently diverted to military uses, and the regime frustrates any effort to monitor aid distribution to ensure that aid is going where it is intended to go - to people starving because of Kim Jong-Il's catastrophic cruelty and incompetence. If we explicitly promise Kim's regime security, and we mean to keep that promise, we are condemning this generation of North Koreans, and the next, and in return are likely recieve only Kim Jong-Il's word, which is of no value. If we break this promise, North Korea will be entitled to its feeling of betrayal.

The best hope is to pressure China to recognize that Kim Jong-Il's collapse is not only in the best interest of the millions of North Koreans suffering under the cruelest regime in human history, (something China has been more inclined to ignore and exploit than anything else), but it will benefit them as well. Benefits for their positive assistance will need to be offered (especially since, should there be a collapse, China is the most likely country to accept an exiled Kim Jong-Il and company should it be necessary to choose between exiling Kim and war.) But China should also be aware that if they can't get results, there are costs as well.

Don't try this at home 

Did anyone see the episode of "Heroes" where Invincible Cheerleader Girl stuck her hand down a working garbage disposal to get a ring?

Yeah, the disposal in my kitchen has an "off" switch too. But hey, when you're invulnerable and a moron, you don't worry about such things, because your mangled hand will grow back!

Besides, that wasn't what she should have been worrying about. What she should have worried about was the prospect that her little stunt would have irreparably tarnished the image of Emerson, the maker of the In-Sink-Erator, and
"casts the disposer in an unsavory light, irreparably tarnishing the product" by suggesting that the appliance "will cause debilitating and severe injuries, including the loss of fingers, in the event consumers were to accidentally insert their hand into one."
Look, I want a garbage disposal that will turn my hand into ground beef if I put it down there - that's how I know it works on the stuff I do feed it. Besides, their own website claims they "grind almost anything."

Anyhoo, the good people at Emerson are suing, because NBC used their trademark without permission and because it makes them look bad to suggest their garbage disposal chews stuff up when you put something in it and turn it on.

The moral of the story - the Japanese time traveling guy really is the best thing about that show. Honorable mention to the Internet stripper with the killer ghost thing.

Tip and further commentary via Cobiwann.

Georgia - where the crazy just don't stop! 

Runaway bride suing her ex-fiance for the money they got selling their story.

Because it would be a real tragedy if she didn't get to keep the money she made from that. I mean, it wasn't like the guy ran away and lied to the police about it, right?

The art of taking a stand without writing a painfully boring book 

Author Salman Rushdie takes Jack Straw's side in the current British brouhaha over Straw's comments regarding veiled Muslim women.
Rushdie, whose book "The Satanic Verses," once led to death threats against him by Islamic clerics, told BBC radio that Straw "was expressing an important opinion, which is that veils suck, which they do. I think the veil is a way of taking power away from women."
He then added, "I understand people might be offended by my point of view. But what are they going to do, threaten my life?"

Auspicious day... 

Aung Sung Suu Kyi, the duly elected Prime Minister of Burma, marks 4,000 days under house arrest today. Money quote:
Speaking to the press in Rangoon yesterday, the Information Minister, Brigadier General Kyaw Hsan, conceded that the NLD had won a majority of seats in 1990, but said the voters did not know what they were doing. Those who voted for it, he said, "did not scrutinise its politics or capabilities and the background history of its candidates". Accusing the party of refusing to compromise with the military, he added: "Now, there is no reason to meet or discuss again with the NLD."
Translation: Yep, we stole the country, and we're keeping it. I mean, seriously, who's going to stop us? The U.N.? Don't make us laugh.

The only person at the U.N. who gives a damn about this is currently none other than Stone Cold John Bolton.
The one ray of hope for pro-democracy campaigners is that last month the United States succeeded, for the first time, in getting Burma placed on the formal agenda of the United Nations security council. This was despite Chinese objections that US claims about the Burmese junta posing a threat to international peace and stability, were "preposterous".

Rangoon has dismissed events at the UN as a US-orchestrated plot to topple the regime. Activists hope the security council will pass a binding resolution demanding Ms Suu Kyi's immediate release and democratic change. They are likely to be disappointed.

China, in an apparent race with India to grab as much trade with Burma as possible, seems certain to veto any stern measures.
It would make things easier for the international community if we'd just shut up about this. With Stone Cold, we piss the world off and make noise anyway.

Without Stone Cold - then what?

Monday, October 09, 2006

Alpha Dog-gone. 

When you have a murder case, and the defendant is named Jesse James Hollywood, you can pretty much bet on a high media profile. Hollywood spent a few years as a pretty famous fugitive, wanted for spearheading the murder of Nick Markowitz, a 15 year old boy who happened to be the younger brother of a man who supposedly owed Hollywood money. Hollywood was eventually captured and brought back to stand trial, which is supposed to happen sometime next year, but interesting things have happened in the meantime.

The big thing is, they made a movie about it. That features Justin Timberlake in a prominent role. (The Hollywood role - renamed Johnny Truelove - will be played by Emile Hirsch.) Ron Zonen, the Santa Barbara County Senior Assistant D.A. assigned to the case, successfully prosecuted several other participants in Markowitz's murder. He served as an unpaid consultant on "Alpha Dog." Zonen's reason for participating, undertaken while Hollywood was still a fugitive, was to assist in publicizing the case and spur efforts to locate Hollywood, and to ensure the movie was factually accurate and not a glorification of Hollywood, who's a cult hero in certain circles. According to director Nick Cassavetes, Zonen was a lot of help, providing all kinds of details about the murder and the defendants. According to Hollywood's lawyer, the finished product portrays Hollywood as "extremely manipulative, vicious, selfish, and without any redeeming character traits whatsoever."

That this is very likely an accurate portrayal is, for the moment, beside the point. The defense tried to get the entire prosecutor's office thrown off the case because of Zonen's involvement with the movie producers. In an unusual ruling, Zonen has been removed from the case, although the Santa Barbara County DA's office, as a whole, is allowed to stay on. The rationale behind the court's ruling concerning Zonen is that Zonen may have disclosed potentially confidential case materials to the film's makers, such as criminal histories of participants. The court further notes that given the high level of judicial scrutiny applied to capital cases, it is better to err on the side of caution and remove Zonen. The DA's office gets to stay because the burden in a recusal motion is on the moving party, and Hollywood presented no actual evidence that the DA or anyone else in that office played a role in Zonen's disclosures. The court sees no prejudice to the state in removing Zonen, other than the time involved in bringing the new prosecutor up to speed.

The Court of Appeals decision may be read here. Alpha Dog will be in theaters January 12, unless Hollywood's lawyers are able to successfully persuade a federal court to block the opening of the movie, on the grounds that the movie would prejudice Hollywood's right to a fair trial.

Always on the lookout for that next job... 

German lawyer seeking compensation for victims of alien abduction. Not sure why this is the state's liability, rather than the aliens, but apparently there's a German law that guarantees state aid to kidnapping victims. And according to this guy, there are a lot of victims out there:
"There's quite obviously demand for legal advice here", Jens Lorek told Reuters by telephone on Thursday. "The trouble is, people are afraid of making fools of themselves in court."
Thank God this lawyer doesn't have that fear.

Remember, folks - lawyers run the world. And you're better off for it.

Tip - SteveC.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

We used to be friends... 

So, apparently Veronica Mars isn't quite pulling in the ratings the CW was hoping for when they gave it the Gilmore Girls lead-in. Now, Veronica only had 13 episodes ordered, as opposed to 22 for everyone else, because despite the fact it's really good, the ratings suck. This means the show's already on double secret super probation, and if the ratings don't get better, Veronica Mars will be done at mid-season.

Now, I like the show, so that would be mildly bad for me. However, my wife loves the show, and my wife is still complaining about Angel getting cancelled, so she tends to take these things to heart. Since Veronica Mars is kind of a serial, viewers may be concerned about being left behind if you missed an episode. So - quick update - Veronica is now at college, along with her boyfriend and the token black guy. (named Logan and Wallace, respectively. Logan's a douchebag. He's not acting like it right now, but wait for it, it'll happen.) She helped token black guy's new roommate find his stuff that got stolen in the first episode, but the only ongoing story you need to know about is there's a serial rapist plauging the college who shaves his victims' heads. Suspects are still being introduced.

So watch the freaking show. The crazy redhead doesn't take these things well.

Thursday, October 05, 2006


Malaysia preparing to penalize people who don't speak correctly.

Note to U.S. President: Stay the hell out of Malaysia.

Um, yeah. Mine too. 

Woman contacts lottery commission saying her dog ate her winning ticket.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006


Two men are claiming to be Anna Nicole Smith's baby daddy.

It's been awhile, but I'm pretty sure I saw this on TV when I was a kid.

Defeat terror. 

JWookie has a plan that will ensure the triumph of all that is good and decent in the world.
As you may already know, it is a sin for a Taliban male to see any woman other than his wife naked, and that he must commit suicide if he does.

So next Saturday a 4PM Eastern Time, all American women are asked to walk out of their homes completely naked to help weed out any neighborhood terrorists.
Read the whole thing.

Someone forward this plan to Jessica Alba, pronto.

Monday, October 02, 2006

Sorry, dude - you're more useful alive. 

So Hugo Chavez thinks George Bush wants him dead. In case anyone doubted that Chavez is an idiot, let's redo the math.

New York Congressman Charles Rangel doesn't like Captain Unilateral. In fact, he has compared G. Dub to the famously racist Bull Connor. This is not a compliment. It's hard to think of anything, or anyone, that could cause some of Bush's fiercest domestic critics to leap to his defense.

At least, it used to be hard. Now we know. When Hugo Chavez speaks, people who hate Bush, defend Bush. They do this because when Hugo opens his enormous yap, being anti-Bush suddenly seems very similar to "being completely out of your freaking mind."

Moral of story - George W. Bush loves Hugo Chavez. Loves him!

Deal with it, or shut the heck up.

Me read book... 

PetiteDov tagged me with a literary meme. A substantially more lowbrow series of answers to the same questions follow...

1. One book that changed your life?
The Last Battle by C.S. Lewis - Lewis' take on the Book of Revelations is the most clear religiously themed book in the Chronicles of Narnia. It's also one of the few books I can clearly point to as having shaped how I view the world.

2. One book you have read more than once?
I read dozens of books multiple times - drives my wife nuts. To select one example - Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire - best book in the series, IMOHO.

3. One book you would want on a desert island?
Another book I've read multiple times - Shogun by James Clavell. I learn or rediscover something every time I read it.

4. One book that made you cry?
Marley and Me - John Grogan. The funny thing is, I haven't read the whole book - just bits and pieces. But with my own dogs, particularly Mishka, clearly feeling their age, stories like Marley's remind me all at once how wonderful, wild, and heart-wrenchingly brief a life spent with a dog can be.

5. One book that made you laugh?
Big Trouble by Dave Barry. He's a surprisingly decent novelist.

6. One book you wish had been written?
The one in my head, that my wife tells me is a good idea, that I've started plotting out, but for various reasons, never get around to actually writing.

7. One book you wish had never been written?
The Devil Wears Prada - Lauren Weisberger. If she hadn't written the book, I wouldn't have had to see the movie.

8. One book you are currently reading?
Gone, by Jonathan Kellerman. I'm not deep.

9. One book you have been meaning to read?
The Book of Fate - Brad Meltzer. After reading Identity Crisis - his spectacular "murder mystery meets the Justice League of America" graphic novel - he's vaulted up my list of must-read authors.

10. Who gets stuck with this next?
There appear to be no rules about how many people to tag, so I'll go with the Official Meme Tagging Policy. When in doubt, tag Dawn Summers. Think of it as my contribution to Dawn Summers' birthday season.

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